Vote For ME!

With this election season heading for an exciting denouement, I thought I would proffer some valuable advice on how best to exercise your precious franchise.  I find the following questions useful to put to the candidates:

• What have you done for me?

• What have you done for me lately?

• Are you an honest politician?  (The only acceptable answer to that is "Yes, I will stay bought.")

Of course it is difficult for the non-incumbent to offer a useful response, but that means that at least he won't have to lie, a temporary plus.  Carefully evaluate the answers the candidates offer to these questions, and then vote for the one who is least telegenic.  He'll lose, but we don't want the pretty boys and girls to have a mandate.

Now that that's resolved, I'd like you to consider voting for me.  If you were to ask me those three questions, I would respond:

• I have saved your life, your fortune, and, although I have come up short on your sacred honor, at least I've provided some help for your pastry.

• Just this week, I have given you the opportunity to avoid durance vile by answering an essay question.

• As far as honesty is concerned, I have never been offered my price, and so honestly can't tell you for sure.

Nonetheless, I am asking for your consideration in voting.  I have been doing "reviews" on eBay for a while as part of a contest and an experiment.  I am inevitably the "first to review" the CDs and books that I select, and for the same reason, I never get any votes for "helpfulness."  Why?  Obscurity, both of the reviewer and reviewees.  Therefore, if you have a minute and an eBay ID, it would be a kindness if you would take a look at one or more of these "reviews" or "guides." (If you don't have an eBay ID, you still might enjoy reading them, but you can't "vote.")

• CD: The United States Of America, Vol. 1 The ... (Freberg, Stan, 1996)

• CD: Grass & Wild Strawberries (Collectors (The), 2005)

• CD: Second Contribution (Phillips, Shawn)

• CD: Blows Against The Empire (Kantner, Paul, 2005)

• CD: Art In America (Art In America, 1996)

• CD: Society's Child: The Verve Recordings (Ian, Janis, 1995)

• CD: Common Bond (Ides Of March, 2004)

• CD: Time & Charges/Portraits (The Buckinghams, 1999)

• CD: Whirlygig * (Lovemongers (The), 1997)

• Book: Somebody to Love? (Andrea Cagan, Softcover)

• Book: Assassination Vacation (Sarah Vowell)

• Buying and Selling Uninterruptible Power Supplies (Guide)

• Buying BIG Uninterruptible Power Supplies (Guide)

• (NEW)Buying a Spectrum Analyzer for your Laboratory (Guide)

• (NEW)Buying High Frequency Spectrum Analyzers on eBay (Guide)

• (NEW)Buying Low Frequency SPECTRUM ANALYZERS on eBay (Guide)

• CD: The Hissing Of Summer Lawns (Joni Mitchell 2000)

• CD: Sunfighter (Kantner, Paul, 1997)

• (NEW) CD: An Evening Wasted With... (Lehrer, Tom, 1990)

• (NEW) CD: Easter Everywhere (13th Floor Elevators, 2006)

• (NEW) CD: Animal Logic (Animal Logic, 1989)

At the bottom of each entry, there is a "was this review helpful" box.  "Helpful" is a bit inappropriate, but to remain in the spirit of the activity, please only vote "YES" if you find it at least somewhat interesting or intriguing, and only after having read it!  Even if you know me or like me, or even, possibly, both, don't just vote for them all willy-nilly.  "That would be wrong."  OK?  Thanks!

I've deliberately put this up for my Friday blog, which keeps on giving all weekend.  If you check back on Saturday or Sunday there should be a couple more to check out.

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