Sorted In Order of Silliness

Storm Non-Update

Guess what irritating, unresponsive, vexing piece of electronic gadgetry has gone yet another month without the software update necessary to make it useful?

Valuable T-Shirt Hint For Young People

T-shirts do not have an indefinite shelf life.  Either that, or manufacturers have been getting more generous in recent years.  As you can see from the TotD, I have been committing T-shirt nostalgia, but as you can't see, I've also been performing triage.  As they get cleaned, they get tried on.  The majority of the older ones, even the XLs, aren't wearable any more.  They shrink in all dimensions, not just the dimension along which you would suspect (incorrectly, as it turns out) that I am expanding.  If you are a young reader given to collecting T-shirts, I offer a recommendation:  If you hope for them to last into your bloggage, add a size for each decade younger than 60 that you find yourself.  E.g., if you normally wear a size L and you are now 35, get a size XXL.  It may fit like a tent today, but will be perfect when you're in your 50s.  

Roy G. Biv Indicted For Assault

The RED faucet should be COLD, the BLUE faucet should be HOT.  Everyone knows that red photons are less energetic (colder) than blue ones.  Repainting water faucets isn't in and of itself a crime, but when Mr. Biv snuck into the factory and repainted all the faucets on the lot of water dispensers to be shipped, he should have known that injuries would result.  I filled a cup with what I thought was some refreshing, cold water.  When I burned myself I reported the incident to the management, who reported it to the police, who investigated and got Biv indicted.

I'm sure he's guilty of a whole spectrum of crimes, but this one damaged me, personally, and durance vile is the only appropriate punishment.  I hope he gets a cell with black walls.

Baby You're My Centipede

Google Search strikes again.  I was listening to Joni Mitchell's Hissing of Summer Lawns album, and, as usual, sang along with my favorite song on that album and belted out "Baby you're my centipede" at the appropriate spot.  Of course those aren't the real lyrics, but I mess up lyrics all the time and get away with it.  The listening and singing prompted me to look up the phrase and, sure enough, it popped up a number of times, including one on a Terry Pratchett site.  It also reminded me that I never mentioned it on this blog, although I did review on eBay the album that contained it.  While the Wikipedia review is more linear and less idiosyncratic, if you read mine you can vote it and my other reviews "helpful" and move me closer to the "Top 1000 Reviewer" category.

The Wikipedia review has nothing about centipedes.

Special Advertising Section Please buy this lovely blue Corvette ZR1!  Now, with Collector's Kit Currently on eBay, starting bid $15,000

NP: "Peace of Mind" Blue Cheer

TotD My friend Ken Schaffer was a pioneer in satellite communications.  His "group" installed private earth stations for both US and Russian teevee satellites long before it became fashionable, and long, long, before it again became unfashionable again.

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